BAH, What is it ?

Take some of the terms used in todays society like , "sick" ever hear sombody say that? it means good. "Bad" it also means good. These terms go on and on. I have a self coined term BAH. BAH means, , " Bleeding Ass Hot" I have to say, I have a weakness for spicey foods. Tai food is one of my favorites. However it is not where I came up with BAH. I like to make and eat hot wings. Now I know some of you are laughing right now so pay attention and I will teach you a little something I have learned to cook. First, start with Tyson wings of fire, I said to stop laughing, Then open the bag ( shocker there) pour in a liberal amount of Tai hot sauce, I like to use the stuff they sell it comes in a squeeze bottle and has all Asian writing on it, so I dont know what it says but if you cant get that get some of Daves insanity sauce, It can be found about anywhere they sell the stuff. If your a little weak, just use tabasco, though the flavor isnt as good. Then add Barbque sauce about a cup and a half. Close the bag, make sure it re-sealed. Then commence to squeezing and needing. For those of you who dont know, " needing is a bakers term for mashing and handling", oh just look it up already! So were squeezing the wings till they are all seperated, by this time they should be well coated with BBQ sauce and hot stuff. I hope you remembered to light the grill while this was happening. I use charcoal with hickory. I put the coals all on one side and dump the wings on the other, close the lid and let them smoke. Cook them untill they are all defrosted , ( yes we put them on frozen ) once they are warm and defrosted , about 30 minuits, move over the coals. Now you must stay there and tend the BBQ. I use a squirt bottle with hot sauce and BBQ sauce mixed. I like Moe Prichards BBQ sauce right now but mostly its Open Pit. I use the squirt bottle because i dont like the brush hairs that invaribley come off and end up on my food, plus you can controll it better. You can get bottles like I have at the dollar store there the kind that you put catsup and mustard in with the white tops and cap.Once the wings start to get a char going start adding your BBQ sauce combo untill you get them cook to your satisfaction, This will give you BAH wings that will not only impress your friends, but will make your wife sleep on the couch after you wash it all down with a couple of cold ones. I usually like to eat stuff like this and Tai food on thursdays that way when im golfing on friday and swilling more beers I have a bad ass case of monkey butt, or commonly known as," Swamp Ass" this tends to make a pasty sort of peanut buttery cheese shit that sort of drags across the hemeroids like a Man-O-War jellyfish. It will produce an ungodly burn and give off noxious emissions that even outside will impress the most seasond warrior of the links. Also good for football Sunday. Hope this will help you BBQ buffs. If anyone has any BBQ tips theyd like to share I would be happy to hear from you. That is all I have tonight. Its time to go. Litterally, Im going to destroy that furgison, Thank god we dont still use out houses, Good night,Im Dave Brokaw and Thahaats the News